Public transit

The recent round of repairs and upgrades means taking public transit.

Allow me, gentle reader, to enumerate the many reasons why the ALGORES of this world, (who, while consuming more power in a month than entire groups of families do in a year (while strangely enough never signing up for the "green power" option) and flying around in private jets, decides that WE the LITTLE PEOPLE need to take public transit) can kindly shove their public transits up their collective ass.

And there's always some recently-arrived-from-Europe poncy Eurotrash type who sneers down his croque-monsieur and says "Eye doant know why yew doant av ze train system like we doo in YURRUP!"

1) This country is poorly designed. The jobs are in hard to reach outlying areas like Bellevue and Redmond.

Unlike Paris, where you can get after a two minute walk from anywhere in Cergy-Le-Haut onto the RER and be anywhere in downtown Paris in forty five minutes.... when I last had to hoof it on ye bus system to my last job, it took me two and a half hours. For a trip that would take 45 minutes by car. But the real kicker was that I had to get three quarters of the way there before 6:45, which was when the last mile bus did its last trip of the morning that morning. Yup. Three buses in the AM, three buses in the PM. If your boss calls an impromptu meeting at 4:45, you're screwed. Not to mention the problem of having to wake up at 3:45 am to get to work.

But that never stopped the transit system from offering us $25 rebates and balloons and T-shirts and "go green" pamphlets telling us to use the transit rather than take our cars. To which I suggested if they really did want us to use the service, they'd have more than six buses a day servicing the areas where the jobs were.

2) People who take buses are of the lower economic strata.

I would never take my kids on a bus. They don't know the words "nigger", "motherfucker", "bitch", "ho" etc. but by God within three minutes they would.

"'s what am sayin, nigga. I don't fuck around, nigga. Know what I'm sayin, nigga? I'se a REAL nigga. A STREET nigga. Know what I'm sayin, nigga? Bitch put her hands on me, I backhanded the bitch across her motherfuckin face. Know what I'm sayin, nigga? They call all security I was like PUT DA HANDCUFFS ON ME DEN! I'M A REAL NIGGA! TAKE ME TO JAIL NOW, know what I'm sayin, nigga? And Miz Johnson, she a dyke, nigga! For real, nigga! Know what I'm sayin, nigga? She's like "you nasty!" and ize like, "yeah? Well at least I don't eat no pussy!" Know what I'm sayin, nigga?"

etc. etc. etc.

Between that and the drunken crazy white guy who swung for me cause he thought I was talking to him.....

Every time I see some bus propaganda showing a smiling happy helpful driver, with upper Middle Class happy types enjoying their carbon neutral ride it makes me sick. Disinterested unionized fatass turning a blind eye to homeless people vomiting Mad Dog 50/50 on the floor just before we start the 45 minute jaunt between cities.... hooray.

3) The buses do nothing but impede traffic and wreak havoc on the roads.

Ever wonder why there are weighing stations? Because, in order that the roads don't get instantly screwed up, you're not allowed to have more than X number of pounds per axle in a vehicle.

UNLESS

you are a bus.

Buses are exempt from this requirement, because apparently even though this sort of thing will wreck the roads, it's okay.

But then again, even though the ferrying of forty crazy, homeless and otherwise undesirable and mutant people takes forty cars off the road these people couldn't afford anyway, that's more than offset by the amount of idling cars stuck behind the obstructive, slow, time wasting conveyances.

SCRAP THE BUS SYSTEM
BUILD MORE ROADS.